bday: JULY 5 "MY COLLEGE BFF,ARTISTIC,SWEET,SENSITIVE,COMPETITIVE,PERFECTIONIST AND LOYAL" ...that's the memory she left me with... My College BFF who died July 2009 due to colon cancer right after graduation and that is the most devastating news I ever had that year. She was my closest friend in College.She would share me all her sentiments.She would cry on my shoulders.She treated me as her big sister.I felt close enough to her.Even if I left school,she keep me updated with school stuff which makes me excited to go back to school not until vacation in 2009,I received a text message from her sister telling me that she passed away.Just like that. How I wish I can protect her and comfort her from everything but I can't.I am not superwoman.She would always talk about how her days went and was always looking forward to meet me after graduation.She filled me with her school routine as I also fill her with work stuff,my first job as a call center agent.She would tell me how she stayed up late for her reports.We constantly text and call each other.There were months that she rarely texted me.That was the months she was so sick and don't want to tell me because she's hopeful she'll get well.I found out everything from her family after she died.I feel so honored to know that the only person whom she talk much to her family is me.That's why when she died,I was the first person they contacted.
I cried so much because I felt like I lost a sister who look up on me.I lost my source of comfort at that time.I felt betrayed too when she didn't inform me that she's sick but I fully understood afterwards because she was hoping it's nothing to worry about and in time,she'll get well.She said,she'll get well and we'll meet for a sumptuous lunch,my treat to her! But it never happened and I cried much because we never got the chance to meet considering that's what she look forward once she gets well.It hurts me all the more.The depth of our friendship is different.The joy we have was immeasurable.I miss Chel for that.What we have was irreplaceable. After she died,I know there's a part in me that went with her on the grave for quiet sometime.Every year whenever July approaches,it gives me this painful pang in my chest.Everytime July comes,I remember both her birthday and death anniversary.July is my halloween month for the year.It's been years but still I think about her always.
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